


Just give me a chance to say I love you (and I need you)

by network



Series: Destiny Shorts [9]
Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: Grief, I'm Going to Hell, M/M, Mourning, Parent Death, Post-Forsaken
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-27
Updated: 2019-05-27
Packaged: 2020-03-20 09:43:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18990148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/network/pseuds/network
Summary: kiss me hard before you go[ Cayde leaves Zavala and their son messages after his death ]





	Just give me a chance to say I love you (and I need you)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm genuinely sorry for this lmao - as some context, Andal is Cayde and Zavala's adopted son, and Kyla is Zavala's Ghost.  
> Also, this is inspired by one of the beginning scenes of Endgame (if you've seen it, you'll know what I mean).  
> Enjoy!

            Cayde has been dead for two months.

            It’s inescapable now, Zavala thinks as he watches the City wake. He’s not coming back. He’s known this for months now, since his body was brought in from the Reef, since he’d been _murdered_ , and yet today feels different - final, somehow. That is, until Kyla nudges against him softly.

            “I have something for you.” His Ghost guides him to the sofa, her optic flickering slightly as something powers to life. _A hologram_ , he realises, as white-blue light projects out in front of him.

            His breath catches in his throat as Cayde appears on the projection, legs folded and knuckles cracking against each other nervously. “I-“ He seems to stall, before unfolding a piece of paper and taking a deep breath. Fingers twitching with anxiety, he reads from the parchment before him – “Hey Zavala, I-… If you’re watching this, I’m dead. Or at least I should be, if Kyla has followed my instructions. I’ve probably been dead for a few months, or however long it’s taken you to accept it, and -.”

            “I don’t know how I died, but I can imagine that it was something stupid, right? Something reckless and preventable. I’ve always been like that, and I – uh, anyway.”

            Zavala isn’t sure when he started crying, but it’s unmistakable now, as salty tears track down his cheeks silently. “I’ve recorded a set of these for Andal, as he grows up, y’know. One for each birthday until his 18th, so that I can kinda be there. -nd give him my cloak, yeah?” Cayde lets out a small, dry laugh. “From one Andal to another.”

            “-nd Zav? Don’t blame yourself. I know you’re gonna anyway because you’re too nice for your own good, and you’re a fucking idiot, but please.. Andal needs you. So does Taea, and Ikora and Shiro and Eyas. So many more people need your attention and love and care than I do. ‘nd I’m sorry for leaving the burden of raising Andal alone on you, but if you teach him anything, please teach him this.”

            “Teach him that he’s enough. That he doesn’t need to live up to my reputation, or yours, or fulfil anyone’s legacy. Love him no matter what. Tell him that I love him everyday.”

            “I love you Blue. Never forget that.”

            The door behind him creaks as the holo cuts off, small pitter-patter sounds echoing against the hardwood floor from light footsteps. Andal – his son, his beautiful, beautiful son – nudges into his arms. “Papa?” He asks in his small little voice, tiny tanned hands patting at his tear-stained cheeks. “Are you sad?”

            “No-“ His voice strains, and he gulps down some emotion. “Not anymore, now that you’re here.” Andal snuggles into his chest and Zavala smiles down at him. “Would you like a present from Caya?” He uses the name Andal had given Cayde back when he could hardly speak, and his son’s green eyes light up in happiness.

            “Daddy has a present?”

            He nods, scooping up Andal in his arms and holding him close to his chest as he retreats back into their – _his_ – room, setting his son on the bed as he digs a box out of his wardrobe.

            It contains all the most personal things of Cayde he still has – his playing cards, the little photo album filled with memories, the small, strange, Golden Age instrument he somehow had remembered how to play. And, folded neatly, his cape.

            With shaking hands Zavala extracts the expanse of fabric, familiar yet so alien against his touch. Andal patters over curiously, and he smiles, strained. Hands still twitching with pent up emotion he unfurls the cape, carefully setting it into place around Andal’s shoulders. He’s bouncing on the balls of his feet, but still careful with the cape (as Cayde had always told him to be) when he pulls the hood over his mess of ginger hair. With a giggle he hugs Zavala and starts pretending to shoot bad guys, the Awoken managing to feign happiness for a moment when he plays dead after Andal ‘kills’ him.

            When Suraya comes around later to pick up Andal and take him to school with Eyas she smiles at him, setting a hand on his shoulder comfortingly as Andal runs out to show his cousin his cape.

            They’ll be okay. Zavala will make sure of it.

 


End file.
